Friends: The One With The London Secret
by GuardianZoe
Summary: An alternative way of Chandler learning the truth about London. Mondler. Monica and Chandler.


"I've got to go."

"Mmm, don't."

"Monica, I have to."

Monica huffed and squeezed her fiancé tighter, "You never normally want to go to work," she mumbled into his neck as she nuzzled it with her nose. "I want you with me."

"I know I never want to go but if I call in sick for the fifth time this week, they're going to start to think something is up."

She left light kisses on his neck trying to persuade him to stay. He sat up but she followed him, clinging to his side.

"Just be a little late," she said with a smile and combed her fingers through his tousled hair. He wanted to stay and hold her close to confirm that she was really his. To confirm that they were really together and engaged and that it wasn't just a dream.

"I can't, Mon. But I'll try get out early – I'll bring you back something nice to make up for this."

She smiled and kissed him, "Fine, but I want your butt in this bed as soon as you are home because I'm not finished with you."

Chandler laughed, got dressed and left, leaving a dishevelled Monica sprawled out under the covers.

Chandler had a hard day at work and the only thing giving him strength to walk home was the thought of being with his fiancée that evening. As he bought her some flowers and her favourite ice cream, he thought to himself about how lucky he was. He felt head-over-heels about this woman and swore nothing could ruin this feeling.

He climbed the stairs to Apartment 20 but stopped himself before he could turn the door handle. He could hear Monica's voice on the other side of the door saying his name. He put the flowers and ice cream on the floor and leaned closer to the door to listen.

"Are you going to tell Chandler?" he heard Rachel ask.

"Are you kidding? He'd go crazy. We just got engaged yesterday, I'm not going to tell him any time soon – I don't want him flipping out on me right now."

"But Monica – " he heard Phoebe begin but Rachel interrupted her.

"No, she's right. It's best he never finds out. I mean, you know Chandler, he's incredibly insecure – this would only hurt him."

"He _is_ insecure and I don't want to make him any worse. If he finds this out there may end up being no wedding at all." said Monica.

"You really think that would happen? That he'd call off the wedding?"

"You'd be pretty upset too if you found out the person you were in love with was looking for your best friend on the most romantic night of your life." said Phoebe.

Chandler's brow furrowed and he stepped back slightly from the door.

"Yes, I was looking for Joey in London but it doesn't mean anything. I only wanted sex." said Monica.

"And you didn't 'only want sex' with Chandler?" asked Rachel.

"Well yeah, but then this developed and-"

"Chandler won't see it as you just wanting Joey for that one night so we have to make sure this never gets out." said Rachel and Chandler cringed.

Monica had been looking for Joey that night in London. That's why she had asked if he was there as soon as she entered the room. She'd been looking for Joey all along; it made so much sense. Of course she wanted Joey. Chandler bit slightly on his own fist as he thought of the two together; a sinking feeling in his stomach as he did so. He turned on his heels and ran down the stairs leaving behind the gifts he had brought Monica.

Hours had passed since Chandler had finished work, yet the girls in apartment 20 hadn't seemed to notice the lack of his presence. They sat around the coffee table drinking red wine and gossiping about Rachel's work colleagues as per usual.

"Pheebs, fancy a coffee downstairs before we see the movie?" asked Rachel.

Phoebe nodded and the two girls hugged their friend goodbye and grabbed their coats. Rachel opened the door and shrieked when she stepped into a sticky puddle.

"Monica! Why is there ice cream outside your door, it's all over my new boots!"

"Ice cream?" asked a confused Monica and her and Phoebe walked to the door. "I don't know. I didn't leave it there."

"Maybe Joey did?" said Phoebe and all three girls glared at Joey's door.

"I'll clean it up. Rach, here," she passed Rachel a pair of her own shoes, "I'll soak yours in some laundry detergent and water for you; it'll come right off," she waved them goodbye after Rachel changed into the shoes, "And remember what we said about today – keep it quiet!"

Monica picked up the pot of half melted ice cream and noticed a bunch of flowers lying a foot or so away from it. She shook her head and knocked on Joey's door.

"Yeah?" he greeted.

"Joey, did you leave ice cream outside of my door?"

"What? No, why would I do that? I _eat _ice cream, I don't leave it lying around."

"Oh,"

Joey pulled a puzzled face but grabbed the ice cream tub from Monica's hands and closed the door.

In her own apartment, Monica washed her hands and poured water in a vase for the flowers. She picked up the little card they had tucked in them and read aloud, "I'll make up for this morning, tonight. Love you, Chandler.".

She smiled to herself and smelled the flowers but her smile soon dropped when she realised the time. Chandler should have been home from work three hours ago.

"He knows!"

Phoebe turned around of the sofa to see a frantic Monica running through the coffee house doors.

"What's going on?" asked Rachel walking back in from the bathroom.

"He knows! Chandler knows!"

"What? How do you know he knows?"

"The ice cream outside my door – well, there were flowers with it that had a card in from Chandler and I'm almost certain he left them there as he ran away from what he heard us talking about!"

Phoebe and Rachel shared a panicked look, grabbed their coats and followed Monica out the doors.

"Where do you think he'll have gone?" asked Phoebe.

"I really have no clue but I'm scared he'll never come back."

"Monica, I think you're overreacting a lit-"

"Really!" shouted Monica over Rachel, "Really, because I could've just completely ruined the best thing that ever happened to me because I was sharing some lousy secret with you two! I think this is a perfectly accurate way to react!"

Phoebe and Rachel exchanged a look and Rachel reached out to comfort Monica, "We'll find him. He'll have just gone for a walk somewhere, that's all." Though deep down, Rachel was worried Chandler may have done more than just go for a walk. She was terrified he might have left for good.

"He's always getting hurt by women, Janice, Kathy and now _me! _I can't believe this. He was so happy this morning and I've ruined it." Monica's voice trembled as she hugged herself for comfort against her anxiety.

Getting drunk on a park bench seemed like the most appealing idea to Chandler but he knew that wouldn't end well. He couldn't stop himself, however, from lighting a cigarette or two as he walked around the dark streets of Manhattan. She'd hurt him so she couldn't shout at him when he got home because he had smoked; he deserved a cigarette.

Home.

When was he going to go home?

Should he stay at Ross' tonight, perhaps?

Though, Monica didn't know that he knew so it would seem strange if he suddenly didn't come home. He'd also promised her that he'd come home as soon as possible and spend the night making the morning up to her. Was he still in the mood to do that tonight? Not really.

He sat down on the grass of Central Park with his back against a tree. This was the same tree he and Monica leaned against as their stomachs settled after their first picnic together as an official couple. She'd sat in between his legs talking away about a new recipe she'd learned for work, as he smiled like a fool thinking about how lucky he was. He was lucky. A woman like Monica would never normally have so much as glanced at him. With Monica he had a friend and girlfriend. But he couldn't get the image of her and Joey out of his mind. Nobody thought he was good enough for Monica. Maybe she thought the same and regretted ever getting with him?

He blew the smoke from his cigarette through his nose with a sigh. He knew he should go home and face her but he just wanted to stay in the quiet park with his thoughts. He closed his eyes and took another puff of his cigarette. His eyes flew open when he heard his name being called from somewhere in the park. He sunk lower behind the tree to hide himself from Phoebe who was calling his name.

"Chandler! Are you here?"

Chandler raked his hands through his hair in frustration then stood up. She spotted him and walked up to him cringing at the sight of the cigarette.

"It's just one... okay, it's my seventh," he admitted.

"We know that you heard."

"What? H-heard what?"

"Chandler, come on."

Chandler flicked his cigarette away and rubbed his neck. "Okay, I heard... how's Monica?"

"She's worried about you. We've been looking for you for like an hour - I sent her home with Rachel. I knew I'd find you."

"That you did," he sighed.

"Chandler, I was upset when I first heard, just like you are, but then I heard what she had to say when she realised you'd heard and run off. She really loves you."

Chandler scoffed and toed the ground.

"Chandler, she thinks she's ruined everything," when he stayed silent Phoebe added, "You love her, right?"

"Of course I love her."

"Then get your ass back home right now before I beat it with that branch!" she pointed and Chandler stepped back slightly.

"Let me just have one more cig-"

"No! Home, now!"

Chandler rolled his eyes but did as Phoebe said after she reached for the branch.

The door to apartment 20 opened and Monica and Rachel both turned to see Chandler and Phoebe. Phoebe gestured to Rachel for her to follow her and they both exited the apartment, leaving Chandler and Monica alone.

"I thought you were never going to come back for a second there," said Monica's shaky voice from the couch.

"I was always going to come home. I just... needed some time."

Monica nodded, "Chandler, I'm sor-"

"It's fine."

"No, no it's not fine. I'm sor-"

"Please don't say you're sorry. I don't want to hear that," he said and sat down beside her on the couch, keeping some distance between them.

Monica played with her fingers as she contemplated whether she should speak again or not.

"Can I explain?" she asked after a while.

Chandler nodded and she turned more to face him.

"What you heard... well, I can't say that it's not true because it is but I swear I don't feel anything for Joey and I never have."

Chandler scoffed and his eyebrows raised slightly.

"What?"

"You sure did have a crush on him when he first moved in."

"I did _not _have a crush. I just thought he was nice looking, that's all. I've never felt anything for him - or anyone - like I do for you."

Chandler stayed silent.

"Look, that night in London I was looking for Joey but I was only looking for him because I knew he'd give me exactly what I wanted."

"Sex. Yeah, I know."

"Chandler," she sighed and ran her hands down her face in slight frustration, "I only didn't go looking for you because I thought you'd turn me away. We've been friends since I was just a teenager, I thought you'd see how drunk I was and say no."

"And because you wanted Joey."

"For God sake, Chandler, I wanted him for one night of just sex. Who knows if either of us would have went through with it."

"When you three were talking earlier it sounded to me like you just didn't want me to find out in case I called off the wedding. Like I'm your last shot at getting married - like you've had to settle for me."

Monica glared at him slightly, "How could you say that? That's ridiculous and hurtful. And I've not settled for you. I'm with you because I want to be."

Chandler shook his head, "Everyone else seems to think you've settled."

"I don't care what anyone else thinks and neither should you. We're the ones that are going to have to spend the rest of our lives together, not them. I'm with you because I want to grow old with you. I want to be your wife and have children with you - I love you, you idiot."

Chandler's head drooped slightly and Monica's eyes filled with pity for him. He was more insecure than she thought.

"I know you don't want to hear this but I am sorry. I'm so so sorry that I've hurt you. But you have to understand that in London I was incredibly drunk - I would never soberly want to sleep with Joey. I know you've been hurt by so many women and that I swore to you I would never do the same but I have and I'm sorry."

Chandler looked from his hands, where his attention had been focused the whole time she spoke, to Monica's eyes. "You're not attracted to Joey?"

"God, honey, no," she smiled a comforting smile, "I can't tell you how glad I am that it was you that was there that night. You're the man I love and that I want to marry. I've never felt for anyone the way I feel for you. I'm so in love with you, Chandler. I don't tell you enough and I really should."

Chandler's lips curled upwards at the corner, "I love you too."

Monica breathed a sigh of relief and took that as a sign she could move closer to him. She wrapped an arm around his shoulders and stroked a hand through his hair. "Please don't ever think that I've settled for you. I know you feel insecure sometimes but you shouldn't."

Chandler leaned into her embrace and rested his head on her shoulder as she caressed the nape of his neck.

"Please don't leave me." said Monica in a small voice.

"I'll never leave you," he squeezed her thigh, "I'm sorry for worrying you. I was upset."

"I know."

"I also smoked a couple cigarettes."

"I know," she said into his hair and kissed the top of his head.

"I've got to stop focusing on the past, haven't I?" he asked and felt her nod, "We're going to get married and grow old together?" he felt her nod again, "That sounds good to me."

She moved to look into his eyes and stroked her fingers over his jawline and lips, "You're the best thing to have ever happened to me, Chandler Bing," she kissed him gently and felt him relax against her. "Want a YooHoo? I can make us some mac and cheese with cut up hot dogs too?"

Chandler's wide smile, that he kept only for her eyes, spread across his lips and he nodded. She knew the way to his heart.


End file.
